I didn’t know that I pride myself in not being clueless but after tonight, I realized it. I have a new client that is a talker. He can talk two hours straight without coming up for air. Tonight we decided to meet at a coffee shop to write up an offer. It was…intense. Looooooots of talking. Anyway, we had our heads buried in papers and explanations and I noticed that we suddenly had a large 20 something crowd come in and that they were pulling chairs around and over for themselves. We just stayed focused and talked…and talked and signed and talked.
At the end of our last scribble I sat up straight for the first time in over an hour and looked around. All the tables and chairs had been pulled to the other side of the room and everyone in the room was either sitting at the tables or standing behind the tables. The odd thing is that everyone was facing me. There was a large gap between my table and the rest of the tables. It was odd and very Stephen King. I looked to my right, only about two to three feet away max, and there stood a musician, a row of microphones, three other musician/singers to his right, and large speakers sitting up on large stands.
What had just happened? The nearest musician was standing there holding his guitar and looking at me. Then we had this conversation:
Me: Is there about to be live music in here or something?
Musician: Uh…yeah. The coffee shop closed over thirty minutes ago. Me: So, am I sitting on your stage?
Musician:Uh…yes. We need this whole area. We are about to have a music thing…a private music thing. You kinda need to ...yeah
I looked at the crowd that was looking at me, the arrangement of the room, the band, and I suddenly felt so clueless. I was “that guy” . My client had had his back to everyone and had an excuse. He jumped up and grabbed all the paperwork and started apologizing for the both of us. All I could do was stand there and turn red.. I have no idea how long the crowd had been focusing on us and wondering what was wrong with “the old guys” but they had a look of growing restless and it all seemed to be focused on me. That's a lot of bad juju; I could feel it.
I still can’t believe I was that “out to lunch”, completely clueless. I had noticed the place had a whole new crowd that came in and I knew that people were moving chairs and I saw a few speakers come through the doors but I just didn’t pay THAT much attention to it all and didn’t put all the puzzle pieces together. I don’t think I can go back there for a while. I am so glad the band didn’t start up before I moved. I am a bit surprised that nobody came up and told us but I guess they thought it was obvious and that I was trying to do some kind of “occupy” thing. My client and I stood outside for another thirty minutes where he explained the difference between aluminum tow bars and ….something, but after a while, all that water and iced herbal tea called nature who in turn sent me a text. I told my client that I was sorry but I had to go…literally. I power-walked back into the coffee shop since “time was of the essence” and decided to go into the side door from which I had made my quick but tardy exit. I was afraid the front door might have been locked or that I would once again draw too much focus. I quickly made my way across the parking lot and burst through the side door. I looked up and I was on stage…on stage…nice. All I needed was a microphone. That’ll put the brakes on the old bladder. I can’t imagine what the crowd, or band, was thinking when they saw me re-enter the coffee shop…on stage. I heard one of the stagehand/ sound guys say, “ok…well…” but I had to stay focused, head down, pace quick. The band kept on playing; they were real professional amateurs. I on the other hand, possibly from doing too many plays in college, looked up at the crowd, smiled and waved . It was one of those “hello, please keep your seats” kind of waves. I did have a fear that someone was going to stop me or tackle me or something but they just all sort of moved out of the way.
I left out of the front door and my client was still standing outside wanting to talk some more. I couldn’t . I was so embarrassed and horrified…I was, once again, embarrified. Being clueless is not something I am comfortable with. I may always be clueless but I am not normally aware of it. What a day; what a way to end a day. Looking back, maybe it was all that herbal tea. I am not used to it. I don’t know what those hippie baristas might have put in there. I could have been high as a kite and not even known it.
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